The Fight

Fighting with someone always brings the worst out of you. Whether the issue is big or small it doesn't matter. No one ever really handles fighting too well. One person will always thing that they're right and you're wrong. It's natural to defend yourself. But arguing with someone you care about can be the toughest thing to deal with because you can potentially hurt someone you love. There's no worst feeling than hurting someone you care about or being hurt by someone you love. Lots of people say that arguing is pointless but I think they're necessary. I don't think you should create or look for an argument for no reason, but I don't think you should try to avoid them either. It's another form of expression. Choose your battles. That's what my mom use to say. I like that because you do have to pick your battles , but you don't run away from them.

The hard part is the aftermath. Having someone upset with you because you didn't budge from your standpoint. Thinking in your head that you had every right to feel the way you felt, to say the things you said, to do the things you did. This part is brutal. It's brutal because if you care enough about the person it will break your heart. But this is the part that I find most helpful about an argument. Fix the problem. Talk! Too many people are stubborn, myself included, and are too prideful to reach out. Arguments should never be left open ended. The worst has already happened. Now its time to figure out how to keep it from happening again. If the person is worth it, than the fight is worth it.

The Game of Life

All my life I've lived with a set of goals in my head. Whether it was something I wanted to achieve that day or something that I wanted to reach in the future. I've always been a competitve person by nature. I was gonna win and you were going to lose no matter what. And if I didn't win I would put myself through every obstacle I could to make myself good enough to reach my ultimate goal, which in my head is how I won. It was an easy way for me to live life and make my family proud. I was good at winning. However, there are times in life where winning is not something that I primarily want to do.

Goals that I've made in the past have consisted of getting good grades, not stressing my parents out, pleasing friends and family, and getting into a great college. I remember when I was a kid and all throughout high school my goal was to become a doctor. So I took some medical occupation courses to test it out and found out I didn't enjoy the field. That ended up being a win that I did not want. I also remember that I wanted to go to a 4-year university right out of high school, but I couldn't financially and didn't have the best grades in order to get scholarships. That was a major loss. So I went to a junior college and did everything I had to do to ensure that I went to a 4-year university. I got into UC Irvine. Got grants and scholarships that paid my tuition and I ended up with the win.

Now, for the first time in my life I'm faced with another decision of winning or losing. But I've realized as I'm getting older that what you choose to win at has to be worth it to you. I've always wanted to make great money in my career after college and do what I love. However, doing what I love is not going to make me lots of money. So now I have to think about what I want in this game of life. Do I want the luxurious life or do I want a life that'll achieve my own personal fulfillment. Time is running out for a decision and for the first time I don't know what to do.

I guess I have to weigh the options and figure out what's most important to me. But for those people who have quit early in their own games, whether it is walking out on your family or not getting a good grade in a class because its kind of hard even though you know you could do it or being content for a position at work because you think you can never get that promotion. You can change your game. You call the plays and depend on yourself to get the win. Play the game of life to the best of your ability no matter what kind of field you're playing on. Take your time and think things through, but never lose focus on your goal. GET THAT W.

A New Outlook

                  High school is a crucial time in someone's life. It's a difficult time. It's a confusing time. You have the people who would do anything to be cool. You have the people who would do anything to be different. But all of our actions to make us fit in with a crowd based on our exterior helps stops in high school. Eventually you have to grow up and most of us, whether we like it or not, are pushed into growing as people. I found this especially happening with success. When I graduated from high school I was beyond excited. I was going to continue on to college and reach my goals in life. However, my goals in life didn't go beyond a year's planning. When we are young we do not think about how are actions today are going to affect our future. And I don't mean our future as in, a couple of years from now or even 10 years from now. It is going to affect us for the rest of our lives.
                 Life is all about a series of multiple life changing decisions. Whether it be the girl you let get away or the decision of going to a community college first and transferring to a university later. It can be a decision to move out of your parents home or a decision to get married at a you a young age. You can choose to lose your virginity at a young age or choose to wait until your wedding day. The point is to accept the decisions you've made. People say to live life with no regrets, but anyone who has ever made a bad decision knows that this saying is untrue. I have plenty of regrets in life which is how our lives are determined. Regrettable decisions are what molds us into the adult life that awaits us. I have came to terms with the idea of recognizing the existence of bad decisions that I have made. The only way to grow into the person that I would like to become is to grow and learn from them. Before life for me was all about having the prettiest girl as a companion, partying without a care in the world, and passing classes. Now, that I am about to graduate from college with my Bachelors in English, I can see the type of life that my decisions have laid out for me.
                College was a great experience for me. Not the way high school was for me. High school was more the time to make friends and help break out of my shell. My college experience was the time for me to break rules and do things that I would never think of doing when I was a young teen. Making the decision to be tame in high school and to do whatever I wanted to do in college was the right decision for myself to make. Applauding yourself for good decisions is just as important as feeling down about yourself when you make bad decisions. Being modest with others is a good thing, but being modest to yourself is something that one should keep from doing. Be confident in your decision making. Sometimes we hit and miss with our decisions. Most of the time when we miss we feel like complete idiots and can't stand the sight of ourselves in the mirror. But when we hit we should celebrate to the same type of extreme in a positive way.
                 I have lived life with plenty of regrets of my own, but as an adult I can now see that all my hard work and all of the obstacles that I have overcome are not the important things in my life. The decisions that I made to get there are what matter the most. Hearing that people make "life-decisions" is confusing to me because every decision that we make is a "life-decision." It affects our lives, in either a major way or a minor way, but overall they change us forever.